August 2006 Archives

Chris and Jenny


Last April, my best friend got married.  I had the honor of being his best man.  As such, I had to give a toast at the reception.  I scoured the net near and far for help, with little success.  I've subsequently gotton requests for the "transcript" of my toast at this wedding.  Mostly from other desparate Best Men.  Hope this helps!


Toast to Chris and Jenny at their wedding

Wayne Yamamoto

April 1, 2006

Hello.  My name is Wayne Yamamoto.  It is an honor, a pleasure, and privilege to be Chris Tolles' Best Man at his wedding with Jenny.   I've known Chris for FIFTEEN years. We've been best friends for many of those years.  I met Chris at Sun Microsystems, when he cajoled his way to work on a project I was leading. We've traveled the world together - Spain, France, Costa Rica, Mexico and all over the United States.  Wherever we go, people ask, "You guys argue so much.  How could you possibly be best friends?"  To that, I answer, "We are best friends not despite of the arguments that we have but because of the arguments that we have.

Our arguments would range from the esoteric and absurd such as what is the inappropriate usage of the blank tile in the game of Scrabble to the truly nerdy and scientific;   "Is the flame of a fire a plasma or not?"  And these debates go on not just hours, but days.  With the Internet, Google, and email, an argument can continue on and on, never having to admit one is right or wrong.

This used to trouble me until a few years ago.  I was having lunch with a friend of mine - actually a mutual friend of Chris and mine.  "I was out with Chris;  He was behaving kinda funny and strange;  Were you out with Chris last night?"  "Um, yes I was."  "And did you have an argument and did Chris lose that argument?"  How could you possibly know?"  "Well, I've noticed that whenever Chris loses an argument to you, he always gets in this funny, quiet, humble, and stubborn kind of way."

I took great pleasure in secret in knowing this.  So even though we rarely admit who is right and who is wrong, there is an underlying integrity to our relationship in which we know when we are right and when we are wrong.  This is what makes our friendship so strong and special.

Fast forward several years, and I met Jenny.  She was smart, beautiful, wonderful, and most of all - nice.  She was nice to Chris, and Chris was nice to her.  Not everyone is nice to Chris, and Chris is certainly not nice to everyone.  I knew then that this day was forthcoming - that one day Chris and Jenny would get married.  And, yet, I had one question; a question that nagged me.

Beneath all of this niceness, would they argue? Argument and debate are so important to Chris.  This question was answered a few months ago - actually over the course of a few months time.

I was out with Chris and I asked him, "Were you out with Jenny last night?"  "Yes I was."   And did you get in a debate and lose that argument?"  How could I possibly know? "Well, I noticed that whenever you lose a debate to Jenny, you always get in this funny, quiet, humble, and stubborn kind of way.

So then I realized - Chris and Jenny would indeed argue and debate.  Chris would win some.  But more important, Jenny would win even more.

So with that, I would like to propose a toast; A toast to Chris and Jenny on their nuptial.  A toast to celebrate the debates that Chris and Jenny will have and cherish.  A toast to celebrate the love, joy, and happiness that they will share for the rest of their lives.  Chris and Jenny - let the debates begin!